The other day, I started a new post to my blog until my computer decided to turn itself off in the middle of my blogging. I was too tired to fight it, so I decided to finish it later. Later then turned into several days, and now it has been nearly a week since I last tried to blog.
Looking back on what I had originally planned on posting, I just sit back and laugh at how inaccurate it is from where I stand today. All last week I was feeling good. I didn't have any struggles with nauseousness at all last week and I was feeling great. I was very encouraged at how I was feeling since I started back at work last Monday. The teachers at my school are given about 2 1/2 weeks of training and time to prepare their classrooms before school starts. At times I get annoyed just because it cuts so far into my summer, but since I am new to this school, it is nice having this extra time to prepare for the new school year. The downside to all this is that I have yet more time to worry about all the odds and ends of how I am going to structure my class and curriculum.
These past two days, however, I have not been quite so fortunate with the nauseousness. I am not very tolerant these days, and every day seems like a struggle. What makes it more difficult to deal with is that I have somewhere to be. I can't decide not to come in just because I am feeling nauseous and I am most definitely not contagious. The only thing that keeps me in perspective right now is when I remember one of my friends who just recently had a baby of her own. Poor girl, she struggled with nauseousness her ENTIRE pregnancy. She had it so bad that she wasn't just on anti-nausea medication, but if she missed one day of her medication, she was violently nauseous and sick the entire day.
Aside from the nauseousness, I am so tired. Actually, I have discovered that the more tired I am, the more nauseous I get. So, I try to get LOTS of sleep each night, but that doesn't really allow me much time to work at home on some school things that desperately need to get done. Many of these things get pushed to "later." Don't ask me when "later" will be because my days are completely filled with various seminars and I don't have much time to get more settled and organized with my class...which perpetuates my lack of productivity and exhaustion. I am very ready to get past this and to start feeling "normal." Whenever that will be.
Right now I try my best to take things one day at a time....or one moment at a time. It's not easy. Especially when I've felt pretty lousy all day, I end up bringing home two crabby girls who won't stop bickering and fighting, I have to try to fix yet one more dinner when I can't stand the smell, sight, or thought of food out of fear of throwing up, and all I want to do is sleep and blink my eyes and the house will magically be clean while my classroom will be perfectly ready for the new school year, and my family will be wonderfully tended to and everyone is perfectly happy and content with life. It will all happen as planned...later.
1 comment:
Leslie - You are one strong lady and everything will work out in the end. You will have a beautiful baby in February and you won't remember how hard these weeks have been. The adjustment from "being married to my job" to "a job and a baby" was difficult for me. I have learned that cleaning the house will always be there, but my baby girl will not stay a baby. Try to keep thinking positive thoughts. It will all come together and your school year will be terrific. Smile!! :)
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